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7 Days of Transition | Lightwaves
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7 Days of Transition

December 11, 2009 by Nicole Davis
1,631 views

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7-daysNicole Davis recently immersed herself in a 7-Day Yoga Retreat. She reflects on the power of sharing her experiences and the healing that happens when we reveal those tender places with another.

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Yasodhara Ashram has become a spiritual home for me.  I cannot fully express in words how wonderful it feels for me to be here.  I first came to the Ashram in September of this year when I was moving into a transition- from dependency on my family.  I got so much from being a Karma Yogini such as a new outlook on how I use my time, but I wanted to learn more about the spiritual practices. The 7-Days of Yoga Retreat was a great opportunity to do that.

I came into this course feeling lost, confused and desperately longing for acceptance from family, friends and for myself. I realize now that once I accept myself, the rest will cease to matter. I still feel confused about life and what I want to be independent of others, but the loss and desperation have faded.  Someone very wise once told me that confusion is okay, it means that I am asking questions. The question I have been asking myself is, ‘how do I create change?’

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Nicole Davis with Kuan Yin in the Atrium at Yasodhara Ashram

The 7 Days of Yoga made me stop and think a lot about how I handle transition.  Some of the big transitions in my life have been very painful. One transition that stands out for me was from childhood to womanhood.  The death of a close friend when I was eleven put this change into motion.  I was forced to look at life without the rose colored glasses of childhood. It was a very difficult adjustment, but as I looked back on these transitions, I saw how much they enabled me to grow and adjust to change.  As one of my teachers demonstrated, simply putting one foot in front of the other places us in continuous transition.  By relaxing into transitions and not fighting the changes, I save myself a lot of grief.  My journal from the 7 Days showed me how many transitions this course put into motion for me.  From scared, to sure; sleepy, to awake and finally from fighting with myself, to loving myself.  The wheels of change are set in motion and I now have the tools, like the Divine Light Invocation to help me develop the courage to take the steps towards greater independence.

A major issue that came up for me in the 7 Days was my fear of being vulnerable.  The mere thought of opening up and sharing my true self made me cringe.  I was so afraid of being judged that I had simply closed off.  Although this is something I am still struggling with, I know that I have been given a beautiful opportunity to move past this fear and to  truly open up and be honest with myself.  As I watched my fellow yogis and yoginis open up and be vulnerable, a deep longing emerged within me.  Why couldn’t I open up like that?  They touched something inside of me that I had forgotten existed and I really wanted to be courageous and vulnerable like this.  There is something so beautiful about the quiver of a bottom lip and the salty drop of a tear.  We all have heartache in our lives, sharing it with others is part of the healing process.  I learned that I owe it to myself to be honest about my fears, otherwise I will never move past them.

I am so grateful for this opportunity to share my experience.  It really feels like a step in the right direction, a step towards opening up and being vulnerable with others.  When I was asked to write this article, I knew I was being given a Divine opportunity.  One of the things I planned to do after the 7 Days was start writing as I have been feeling very blocked lately.  I asked Divine Mother to guide me past this, and here I am, writing again.  Ask and you shall receive.

Divine Love and Light is always present in our lives and I truly believe that now.  All I have to do is be open to that Love that surrounds me.  I have been humbled and awed by this experience, and I am grateful to my inner compassionate guide.  I have opened up a whole new world and strengthened my sense of self.  The deep penetrating questions that Swami Radha asks, “Who am I?  What is the purpose of my life?” remains with me.   I don’t have all the answers, but I know I am ever changing and ever growing.  I am who I am, and who I want to be.  I have relaxed into the transition that is my life, functioning from my centre.

Much Love, Light, and Compassion to all those who helped me start this journey.
Namaste.

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Editorial Note: Nicole left this week to start her new life in Tofino, BC, a journey she said she in now prepared for.  She said it is the courage she has developed by coming to the Ashram, stepping into the unknown and alone, emerging with a strength that will support her forever on her journey.


2 Comments »

  1. Thank you so much Nicole for this beautiful testimony to the power of Swami Radha’s teachings.
    Joan

    Comment by Joan Gamble — December 16, 2009 @ 2:33 pm

  2. Beautifully written – you are wise beyond your years. I am so very proud of you. Mom

    Comment by Mom — December 22, 2009 @ 10:36 am

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